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You are calling crying about a stupid cat, when I’ve lost my youngest son???
"Why don’t you go into the basement, throw a rope around the rafters, and HANG YOURSELF, you selfish thing?"
My brother who was the closest to me had passed 2 years before, but on Sundays she keeps a vigil for him – which means no talking to anyone, especially me, who live 500 hundred miles away from her.
She is usually in speech as vicious and malicious as she can be, and calls me every name which could psychically wound the strongest of people. I have tried my best to forgive her and find out what her true rage is about, but she is unresponsive.
She has told lies about me to others in order to isolate me more from anyone who may find me a friend.
She’s even turned the family against me because what she wants is total power and control over a daughter, I, who am not conventional and do not care to keep up with the hypocrisy of keeping up with the Joneses’, as she and my other brother do.
She tries to restore a brief state of friendliness to me, by making home made food. and sending it with my older brother who dislikes me.
I refused to see them on Friday when they came to Wisconsin to help him move to a far away part of the country.
I want to move too, but she’ll say when you are ready to move and that means taking everything out of your house by yourself, then you can move…until then, you’ll have no help from us.
When I said I did not want anything from her as a better than nothing, only in her favour peace-pipe, she became so impossible she sent the stuff over anyway with my brother, and he pounded and pounded on the door, rang the doorbell and then stayed a while until he sensed I REALLY WAS NOT COMING OUT. Suffice it to say – that her peace-pipe food is still untouched, outside!

What I would like to know d from you is how I can disengage from this mentally ill woman who hates me, for WHO knows what reasons exactly and leave her behind to devour her own self through all the rage she feels for me, and the AWFUL punishment I receive because of it, because she is both unable and unwilling to look at herself and get the help she needs, so that I am always the whipping girl in the pillory.

I’d really appreciate any sensible help you may offer, for I have reached a point of such debilitation that I fear SERIOUSLY for my health which is in a downward spiral, thanks to this tyrant?

How, what do I do to begin????? For I know now I am not going to survive.

I thank you.
I will look out of desperation for this link’s information…but I can tell you right now, THIS is no common ailment. And I am the one chosen to receive the brunt of what even I can recognize IS Brutality, undeserved!
It seems you have removed your answer..Dr. Kouki, was it? This is no laughing matter but I’m beginning to think that humanity certainly and very quickly is succumbing into being a GREAT BIG JOKE!
NotYou31, I don’t live with my mother. She lives 500 miles away from me. My younger brother’s death didn’t have much of an impact as to how she has always been.She has been asked, cajoled, pleaded to go for psychiatric help, but she doesn’t, because she claims, & truly believes, for she’ll say it with vehemence : "PERFECT!"When my younger brother died, she called me to tell me she’d taken his dead hand & apologized for me, once having asked him, if he would call a businessman who was running this condo complex and would ask him if he could repeat to my brother what he had said to me, since I understand very little of business. She asked my dead brother to "forgive me" for having bothered him. I had not bothered my brother, he simply clarified in very few words what the businessman had said. & my brother hadn’t been troubled at all! He’d very pleased he’d aided in the clarification.To my mother however, I’d committed a great intrusion into my brother’s time, not to be forgiven! Thanks!
Thank you Mary and Kelsey!

Dude, you need a few thousand years of compassion training. That is all I have to say to people who have a hole for a heart, as obviously you do. Your just desserts are on the making though…Let us hope your hard nose style can stand your waiting cummapence. PEACE!
I appreciate all ur answers, for the exception of 1.I’ve been away trying to understand how all has gone this way-but it hasn’t removed my sorrow and feelings of compassion, & sympathy for her-after all, after her death or mine, whichever comes first,something so unresolved at this time in life, will remain ETERNALLY unresolved, & very painfully as well.However I do recognize the need to stay at safety’s distance, lest I become ill, or go into insanity.I do not understand how I became a rival to my mother at the age of 2 weeks, because my father was so enthusiastic having had his wife given him "into light" (Darle luz) in Spanish, a daughter instead of only male children.However I can understand that that is THAT, & must live with such an insane legacy for the rest of my life.I love my mother very much, but some people 1 simply can’t love because they constantly reject however 1 tries to love them.I thank U all for ur candid responses.It was ONLY TODAY I could respond.Please excuse me

You ARE capable of packing all your things and moving away. It might take some time to do but what is to stop you from packing up bit by bit and storing it in rooms where it won’t be seen easily if they come near your place? And if necessary, keep the curtains shut in those rooms. If they don’t see, they don’t know and if they don’t know, they can’t increase the pressure on you. And then one day, you go! If possible, without leaving a forwarding address or any way for them to work out where you are. Contact a lawyer or the police if you could be found through electoral rolls or other legal means and ask how you can stop that from happening.

It sounds like moving well away would be a good idea. And don’t make the assumption that no-one cares or is your friend because if you sit down and start thinking about everyone you know, you might realise that at least one of them DOES care what is happening and would be more than happy to give you a hand at moving away. I was in an abusive relationship and after separating from this person, it took me some time to come to the conclusion that just MAYBE, a childhood friend might care about me, even though I was sure my family didn’t. But in fact, my family DID care, they just didn’t know what had been going on because my abuser had managed to get me to think that they weren’t any good and didn’t care about me and so I hadn’t told them what was going on. Quite a few people really did care about me.

You seem to have some idea of the cycle of abuse – you rightly recognise the peace-offering system and reject it. Part of the cycle of abuse includes the "I’m sorry, let me make it up to you" type of behaviour which is part of keeping you locked into the cycle. Such as a man comes home drunk and bashes up his wife. The next day he buys her flowers as an apology and says things like, "You know I didn’t mean to hurt you and I love you." What he doesn’t say and won’t face is that he has an abuse issue and alcohol abuse issue. She stays in the cycle, treating it as less of an issue than it really is because she has learned to buy into his setup. There is a good chance you are in a similar cycle but are beginning to see that you should get out. It’s not clear to me from what you say here, but I suspect it could be the case.

One thing is for sure, you need to set boundaries and stick with them and that could be moving right away and refusing contact while seeking help for your recovery or staying where you are and getting help to set boundaries and recover.

You are NOT to blame in any way for what she does to you. Even things you may have done wrong to her, have a hard look at what you did and why; people in these situations often do wrong and then beat themselves over the head for it, without realising that some of what they do is done in desperation, or as a way of trying to survive. Been there, done that. It took me a while to stop even "forgiving" myself for some of the things I had done which had been simply trying to defend or protect myself. No, I wasn’t in the wrong for lashing out at someone physically, attempting to "deck" them when they were attempting to scald my head and face.

You have made a start. You have recognised the issues and the impact it’s having on you. Keep going, seeking advice, support from counsellors and support groups, consider moving, changing your phone number to a silent one and don’t give it to her, get the phone company to log her number as a nuisance caller, take out a restraining order (usually free or cheap) to keep her and your brother from being allowed to come over to your place or any other restriction that you think needs putting on them; they can be arrested for breaking a restraining order and unless someone is off the rails, they will be likely to behave at least reasonably towards someone who is coming out with false accusations, so if they fail to behave reasonably to you, it makes a fairly clear case that what you are saying is fact, not make-up as they may try and claim. Keep a diary of what happens; it can be a clear proof if ever you need evidence. Also include what the effects on you are. I found this very hard to do and would suggest that very brief notes might be best – usually the incidents are burned into your memory so well that a few words are enough for you to recall fairly clear details for at least months and sometimes years to come. Write letters to yourself or journal, if that will help you to cope with what’s happening. For a while, I wrote letters on the computer which never got sent to someone I had once met only briefly and who had been nice to me. It was quite therapeutic.

Hang in there – it will take some time to work your way out of this to a better place but it’s worth the time and effort.

CHAPTER ONE
Darkness Approaches

Daybreak was about as the sun peaked over the top of the Northern Mountains. Grey clouds moved out, presenting clear skies. The rain droplets on the glass windows from the night before began to fade. Strong gusts shook the rickety rooftops of many village homes that were scattered among the miles of farmland. It was just like any other day through the quietness of Pyro Village. It seemed almost deserted with the only sound of the wind blowing through trees and crackling leaves littering across the trail.
Pyro Village was a peaceful place that ran for over fifty miles on the southern part of the first island named Elpine. The village was surrounded by a tall wooden fence that kept out intruders. Half of the village was located in the dense forest and shaded by the thick treetops. Most of the homes were made from small handmade blocks of wood, that were crafted to inter lock with each other. The rooftops were made of hay that was compressed into panels that were six inches thick by two feet wide and were as long as needed.
On a normal day in the village the men would work on the farmland and the woman would stay home, taking good care of the children and especially the grass. The landscapes were beautiful and perfectly manicured. There was not a flower out-of-place. Each day in Pyro Village was the same as the day before, nothing changed. Almost everyone in the village enjoyed their life of work, but others needed some type of diversity. Max Leoguard was in that minority of people, along with his three best friends, Sean, Miranda and Jess. The four of them were a little different from the other teenagers in the village, which was the reason why their only friends were each other. Unlike anyone else, the four of them excelled at sword battling, which was the type of education children and teens must all go through. All children over the age of twelve were required to be educated and proficient on how to fight with a sword. They were also required to carry one at all times. This rule was proclaimed ever since a small army of Avengers unexpectedly attacked Pyro Village. At that time the outer defenses of the village were weaker and more people were letting their guard down, even though travelers warned them about a distant war going on. The attack happened over ten years ago and Max still remembered it up to this day.
Years before the attack, travelers would pass through the village time and time again, warning the citizens to leave, do to a great war involving monsters known as Avengers. These were giant-like creatures that stood over ten feet and had three baseball sized eyeballs that sunk into its head. They had dark rugged skin and long toenails that jutted out from their two feet. The most horrifying feature was their skillful level of sword battling that was down right terrifying. Just one Avenger could have the power to kill over thirty men in just a few short minutes. Many travelers warned Pyro Village of such a presence, but many citizens just scoffed and thought nothing of it.
Max always use to say that “People in this village think they’re invincible and that nothing can happen to them.” No one ever listened to what Max had to say, but soon they would regret it.
On the day of the attack it was just like another afternoon doing daily chores in Pyro Village. Then the unthinkable happened. Twenty Avengers destroyed the outer gates and marched inward, killing livestock and ripping up the beautiful grass. Eventually, the fire dragons of the village burned the Avengers to the ground and saved the lives of thousands.

Wooowwwiiieee!! That is amazing! VEry creative, and descriptive! It is absolutely publishing material!!